This is my back-and-forth conversation in my head when my house cleaner called this morning and said that she'd hurt her arm, couldn't come today, and wouldn't be able to come for two more weeks:

Dammit! Now I have to clean the house.
Oh good, I don't have to pick everything up, which I was just getting ready to do.
I'll have to change the sheets today.
But I don't have to do serious cleaning till tomorrow.
Oops, God forgive me... I hope Elia's arm will be okay and that she's not in serious pain.
Can a house go four weeks without being seriously cleaned?
I'm saving 75 bucks!!! (This is a huge deal since I only paid 30 in Heber.)

Actually, by 10:30 AM, I'd changed the sheets, vacuumed up all the dog hair, cleaned the toilets and the kitchen counters. And that may do it for two more weeks.